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03 February 2009
My comment on "Caught in a Downpour"
I read the article "Caught in a Downpour", on the NY Times "Proof" Blog, and thought it was a wonderful article with a few spot on quotes, my favorite:
but then I started to read the comments. Now, typically on NY Times articles/blogs, the comments are of a higher caliber, and I'm never afraid of Goodwin's Law, but for some reason, this article brought out all the nut-jobs who have brains approximately the size of the Canada Goose that took down US Airways Flight 1549. I began to comment on the site, in a presciently vain attempt to defend the author somehow, but realized as I typed more that I would not be serving the audience 3 pages into the comments by giving them an 800 word "comment". I would just be another twat with too much time to grandstand about booze.
This is why I have my own blog. :-).
Please, please read the article, and go through at least the first page of comments before you read further. As this is my response to both the article and the comments, and if you don't read it (I know, clicking once and then coming back to this is going to be extremely difficult for you all), you're going to be like a child that wanders in during the middle of a conversation. Here, is what I WOULD have said, had I hit send on my comment...
Thanks for the wonderful article - I'm a bit shocked at all the negative comments, indignation and downright ignorance about the topic though.
For the vodka connoisseurs who claim that the drink should be served as cold as possible to bring out the proper taste, you conveniently forget that cold liquid numbs taste buds to the point that you cannot taste. That is why white wines should never be served chilled, nor vodka or any other quaffable beverage (I remember working at a bar once where a patron wanted nothing but ICE cold beer, because it tasted better, and nothing short of ice chunks in his bottle would do. This man was an alcoholic that just didn't want to taste his booze and had to be thrown out every time he came in.)
The very definition of vodka is supposed to make it as tasteless as possible - and yes there is a clear distinction between potato and grain vodka, and I hope you can tell the difference between eating stuffing and mashed potatoes, that isn't what the author was trying to describe.
To those of you who are upset about the "downpouring" - I hate to say it, but it happens - and it usually happens for a reason, which is well elucidated by Mr. McDonald in that most patrons can't tell the difference between top shelf and well booze of certain liquors. The reason for this is the history of cocktail mixers. They were created to disguise the taste of "bathtub gin" that was created during prohibition in the 30's, and as such continue to do a good job of disguising the taste of the alcohol. The only major difference in vodka is the price markup due to the marketing budget of the distiller/distributor. Sure, there IS a difference in taste, but it is usually so marginal as to not really matter, unless you're drinking it straight. Last I checked, most people at bars don't drink vodka straight. Homeless people do though (And I have before, though I'm not homeless - I just like to educate myself about different kinds of alcohol by tasting it without additives, and I don't mind drinking it on the rocks, but rarely if ever will sip a vodka neat).
This downpouring, while easiest with Vodka, CAN be done with Gin and with Medium quality (but high markup) tequila, such as Patron. It's not a very ethical thing to do, but if someone orders a Patron Silver tequila margarita, and gets Sauza Blanco instead, there is zero percent chance of them noticing the difference (and the hangover WONT be any worse because the distillation of blanco tequilas doesn't really matter). High grade reposado or anejo tequilas are a different story, but considering that the most frequently ordered tequila beverages are either margaritas or Long Island Ice Teas, its fairly safe for bars to take that risk (and again, most will not, but some bartenders might).
Basically, the author of the post is describing what happens at SOME bars, especially popular ones that attract a lot of posers who don't know a sweet from a dry vermouth (yeah, go ahead and put dry vermouth in your Manhattan, as I've seen some people insist upon...), that has a high volume and high turnover. For those of us who enjoy the taste of alcohol for the sake of the alcohol itself, we know better. We also aren't going to be the ones ordering "grey goose and crans" (also known as the greatest crime to the creation of a cape codder ever). Nor will we even be ordering "Beefeater Martini's" - if we want a martini, we should trust the bartender to create it for us and for it to taste good. Or we'll send it back - who cares which brand is in it? In a sense this reminds me of a story I read about rich Arab tourists in western hotels. They would order thousands of dollars of the most expensive champagne they could, and even though they are not allowed to drink it, having bottles of Cristal at their table was important to their "image." What would they do after ordering these bottles? Spray it all over one another of course.
If you are conscious about your image while at a bar, take the time to find out as much as you can about whiskey (which has a long and distinguished heritage) or wine (which you can at least sound snooty about). Cognac works too (though in my experience, once you hit the level of about $100 retail for a bottle, anything else is just markup). DON'T pay $300 dollars for table service of Grey Goose. DON'T order Patron Gold Margaritas. And for God's sake, enjoy drinking for drinking's sake.
Anyone who says that the hangover is better on more expensive stuff is kidding themselves. There might be fewer impurities in alcohol that is more distilled, but the only way to prevent a bad hangover is to not drink too much.
And with that, I've gotten bored writing about this. Hope that it provides a modicum of education for those who read it, and maybe encourages some debate amongst your family and peers.
Drink responsibly.
When I was 15 I had something called “Tango,” a premixed beverage of vodka and Tang that came in a pint bottle, I think NASA developed Tango in case Dean Martin was ever sent into space.
but then I started to read the comments. Now, typically on NY Times articles/blogs, the comments are of a higher caliber, and I'm never afraid of Goodwin's Law, but for some reason, this article brought out all the nut-jobs who have brains approximately the size of the Canada Goose that took down US Airways Flight 1549. I began to comment on the site, in a presciently vain attempt to defend the author somehow, but realized as I typed more that I would not be serving the audience 3 pages into the comments by giving them an 800 word "comment". I would just be another twat with too much time to grandstand about booze.
This is why I have my own blog. :-).
Please, please read the article, and go through at least the first page of comments before you read further. As this is my response to both the article and the comments, and if you don't read it (I know, clicking once and then coming back to this is going to be extremely difficult for you all), you're going to be like a child that wanders in during the middle of a conversation. Here, is what I WOULD have said, had I hit send on my comment...
Thanks for the wonderful article - I'm a bit shocked at all the negative comments, indignation and downright ignorance about the topic though.
For the vodka connoisseurs who claim that the drink should be served as cold as possible to bring out the proper taste, you conveniently forget that cold liquid numbs taste buds to the point that you cannot taste. That is why white wines should never be served chilled, nor vodka or any other quaffable beverage (I remember working at a bar once where a patron wanted nothing but ICE cold beer, because it tasted better, and nothing short of ice chunks in his bottle would do. This man was an alcoholic that just didn't want to taste his booze and had to be thrown out every time he came in.)
The very definition of vodka is supposed to make it as tasteless as possible - and yes there is a clear distinction between potato and grain vodka, and I hope you can tell the difference between eating stuffing and mashed potatoes, that isn't what the author was trying to describe.
To those of you who are upset about the "downpouring" - I hate to say it, but it happens - and it usually happens for a reason, which is well elucidated by Mr. McDonald in that most patrons can't tell the difference between top shelf and well booze of certain liquors. The reason for this is the history of cocktail mixers. They were created to disguise the taste of "bathtub gin" that was created during prohibition in the 30's, and as such continue to do a good job of disguising the taste of the alcohol. The only major difference in vodka is the price markup due to the marketing budget of the distiller/distributor. Sure, there IS a difference in taste, but it is usually so marginal as to not really matter, unless you're drinking it straight. Last I checked, most people at bars don't drink vodka straight. Homeless people do though (And I have before, though I'm not homeless - I just like to educate myself about different kinds of alcohol by tasting it without additives, and I don't mind drinking it on the rocks, but rarely if ever will sip a vodka neat).
This downpouring, while easiest with Vodka, CAN be done with Gin and with Medium quality (but high markup) tequila, such as Patron. It's not a very ethical thing to do, but if someone orders a Patron Silver tequila margarita, and gets Sauza Blanco instead, there is zero percent chance of them noticing the difference (and the hangover WONT be any worse because the distillation of blanco tequilas doesn't really matter). High grade reposado or anejo tequilas are a different story, but considering that the most frequently ordered tequila beverages are either margaritas or Long Island Ice Teas, its fairly safe for bars to take that risk (and again, most will not, but some bartenders might).
Basically, the author of the post is describing what happens at SOME bars, especially popular ones that attract a lot of posers who don't know a sweet from a dry vermouth (yeah, go ahead and put dry vermouth in your Manhattan, as I've seen some people insist upon...), that has a high volume and high turnover. For those of us who enjoy the taste of alcohol for the sake of the alcohol itself, we know better. We also aren't going to be the ones ordering "grey goose and crans" (also known as the greatest crime to the creation of a cape codder ever). Nor will we even be ordering "Beefeater Martini's" - if we want a martini, we should trust the bartender to create it for us and for it to taste good. Or we'll send it back - who cares which brand is in it? In a sense this reminds me of a story I read about rich Arab tourists in western hotels. They would order thousands of dollars of the most expensive champagne they could, and even though they are not allowed to drink it, having bottles of Cristal at their table was important to their "image." What would they do after ordering these bottles? Spray it all over one another of course.
If you are conscious about your image while at a bar, take the time to find out as much as you can about whiskey (which has a long and distinguished heritage) or wine (which you can at least sound snooty about). Cognac works too (though in my experience, once you hit the level of about $100 retail for a bottle, anything else is just markup). DON'T pay $300 dollars for table service of Grey Goose. DON'T order Patron Gold Margaritas. And for God's sake, enjoy drinking for drinking's sake.
Anyone who says that the hangover is better on more expensive stuff is kidding themselves. There might be fewer impurities in alcohol that is more distilled, but the only way to prevent a bad hangover is to not drink too much.
And with that, I've gotten bored writing about this. Hope that it provides a modicum of education for those who read it, and maybe encourages some debate amongst your family and peers.
Drink responsibly.
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